
Bedtime routines help children learn to transition from the busy
activity of the day to settling down for sleep. It is a time to teach children
how to soothe themselves and how to relax. Help them learn a few relaxation
tricks like tensing and releasing muscles or thinking about a favorite place.
This is a gift they’ll use forever. Planning ahead before your child bedtime
can make a big impact. An important part of being independent is having the
skills to settle yourself down when you are tired or stressed after a long
working day before your child’s bedtime. Being ready will also minimize
distractions. Studies have shown that children who have a good bedtime routine
are more likely to follow good schedules as adults. This is because early
bedtime routine helps children learn when to switch from the activities of the
day to a calm time for sleep. The early you introduce it, the better. It is
recommended that good bedtime routine should be started when a child is as
young as 6weeks old, and maintain a regular schedule each night.
However, there’s also something about a quiet gloomy room that
invites conversation — building your child’s sense of personal value, answering
the big questions, teaching your values through stories and talk. Regardless of
age, regular schedules and bedtime rituals greatly impact our ability to obtain
sound sleep and function at our best. Also, when children know that bedtime is
a time when you give a few minutes of undivided attention, they often save up
their most sensitive questions for sharing. Yes, sometimes they’ll use it to
hang onto you when you really want to get to your own projects.
Remember, consistency and repetition play big role in making this a success: As children grow, the actual routine will continue to advance and change but the fundamentals will remain the same. When you are loving and firm about when it is time for bed, you are building your children’s confidence in their world. Repetition for

There are no hard-and-fast rules for sleep behavior, and as
always, there is individual variation. Your child is unique. If your routine is
working, then it is probably best for you. That said, some approaches work
better than others…..
These guidelines have been shown to be effective:
1. Make sleep a family priority, advises the National Sleep
Foundation: Determine how much sleep each family member needs and ensure that
they ĵget it. Discuss any sleep problems with your child's doctor. Most are
easily treated.
2. Learn to recognize sleep problems in your child: According to the
NSF, you should look for things like difficulty falling asleep, nighttime
awakenings, snoring, stalling and resisting going to bed, having trouble
breathing, and loud or heavy breathing while sleeping. These sleep problems can
be evident in daytime behavior such as being overtired, sleepy, or cranky.
3. Consistency: As in all aspects of
parenting, consistency and follow-through are key ingredients for success.
Without them, you just can't expect your child to learn or change behavior.
4. Teamwork: If you are co-parenting, it is important to discuss your
strategy beforehand and work as a team. If you are beginning a nighttime
program after having some difficulty with your child, explain your new
expectations, if your child is old enough.
5. Set a regular bedtime and wake time: This sets and aligns
expectations for both you and your child and allows you to plan the bedtime
routine accordingly. Otherwise, you may have a tendency to slip and slide late
into the night.
6. Routine: Kids love it, they thrive on it, and it works. Routines set
expectations and help train behavior; a nightly bedtime routine helps your
child learn to be sleepy, just like reading in bed may put some of us adults to
sleep (even when we're out of bed). The structure of bedtime routines also
associates the bedroom with good feelings and provides a sense of security and
control. Routines can take the stress out of bedtime and help make it a special
time, especially if you have more than one child.
7. Dress and room temperature: Again, there are no
absolutes here, but a rule of thumb is to dress your child basically as you
dress yourself, keeping in mind that younger children often kick off the covers
at night and are unable to cover themselves. People generally sleep better in a
cooler (but not cold) rather than warmer room.
9. Room and bed sharing: Some parents may feel
sharing their bedroom and/or bed with their child is more natural than having
separate rooms, that it is important for emotional development. There may be
cultural preferences as well.
10. One last thing: Kids will always have that
one last thing -- kisses, hugs, using the bathroom. They can be quite
inventive. Do your best to anticipate all this and get it done before getting
in bed. And let your child know that once they are in bed, they have to stay in
bed.
From the point of view of obtaining uninterrupted sleep and
considering various social and psychological issues, it is generally not a good
idea. First, everyone sleeps better alone -- that is, we have fewer sleep
disturbances and awakenings. Children in the same bed and/or bedroom also may
not learn how to fall asleep themselves and tend to have sleep problems.
Smothering is also a concern.
Having a child in the bed with you may also have serious effects on
your intimacy and sex life. Leaving your child with a sitter may become an
issue as well. The longer the child sleeps in your bed, the more difficult it
becomes to decide exactly when he or she should stop and eventually move into
his own room. Sleeping separately is also important to help a child learn to
separate without anxiety and form his or her own identity.
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